The Catskill Chronicle

By Jude Waterston

The thought of food and its preparation and presentation take up most of my waking hours. What could be a more perfect present, then, for me (and Janet) than a $50 gift certificate to a restaurant? A couple of houseguests, thanking us for a favor, bestowed this treat of a meal at a Latin American place in Kew Gardens, Queens. The certificate came in the form of a Xerox printed sheet of paper along with a page of the restaurant’s offerings.

First thing I did was peruse the menu, item by item. There was a selection of tapas as well as soups, salads, sides, and a dozen entrees. Salmon al horno encrostado en yuca, roasted salmon encrusted with yucca and plantains with grilled pineapple sauce, sounded intriguing. Paella Valencia, traditional Spanish paella rice with chicken, chorizo, shrimp, mussels, clams, calamari and octopus, caught my eye, and Churrasco a la brasa, grilled skirt steak with three chimichurri sauces served with rice casserole, greens, and sweet plantains, made my mouth water.

Janet, meanwhile, checked out the gift certificate for hours of operation, the address and telephone number of the restaurant. There was a long list of terms and conditions at which she quickly glanced: “Expires one year from date of issue; no cash back upon redemption or at any other time; only one gift certificate can be used per party, even if the party is seated at separate tables; use of gift certificate for alcoholic beverages is at the sole discretion of the merchant,” and the like.

The restaurant was a short drive from Janet’s apartment and, the other day, we decided on the spur of the moment to go for lunch. The simply decorated, handsome room was long and dimly lit, with tables for two along one side and seating for larger groups on the opposite wall. As soon as we were seated, Janet pulled out the gift certificate and presented it to the waitress. Another woman, perhaps the hostess, soon arrived and pointed out a little stipulation printed just above the massive list of terms and conditions. It was listed as “Special Instructions,” and those instructions were that our certificate was only valid with a minimum purchase of $100 and could be used only at dinner. And what would you guess the management’s discretion regarding alcoholic beverages was? Would the gift certificate have covered any part of them? That’s right, nada, as they say in Spanish.

“Well, we’re here already,” Janet shrugged, “and you said the menu sounded good.” Making the most of things, we ordered a couple of glasses of Pinot Grigio and opened our menus. Within moments we’d decided to sample a selection of tapas as opposed to one entrée apiece. We chose an empanada filled with chicken and one with ground beef; slow roasted honey glazed baby back ribs served with “cold slaw;” fried calamari served with an avocado aioli; ceviche of fresh salmon with cilantro, onions, and capers; and a salad of mixed greens, avocado, grapefruit, and roasted beets.

A plate of long, slim fried plantain chips arrived with a ramekin of avocado aioli, which was mucho (too mucho) garlicky. We sipped the wine, which turned out to be mediocre, but at $6 a shot, we should’ve foreseen the quality. The empanadas hit the table along with more avocado aioli and another dipping sauce of smoky chipotle peppers pureed with mayo, which neither of us much liked. The chicken and beef half-moon pastries were deep-fried, as was the calamari, and I was grateful when the salad arrived to cut the grease, though I noted that they must’ve been short on grapefruit in the kitchen because our greens came adorned with only two measly citrus sections. Sadly, the ribs were nearly devoid of meat and the “honey glaze” was a sickly-sweet, sticky coating of goop and accompanying them was a smattering of greens as opposed to any kind of slaw, “cold” or otherwise. Again, I yearned for something to complement the flavors presented thus far and waited hopefully for the raw salmon ceviche, always a bracing and clean-tasting dish. But alas, it came to the table bound in mayonnaise, a gelatinous pile of chopped salmon that did nothing to clean the palette. “Those house guests meant well, but their gift was a gaff,” I said to Janet, who nodded in agreement as she dug in her bag for her share of the bill.

Perhaps we could have spared ourselves the trip if I had checked out the restaurant’s website before we set out. It promised, in part: “Our mouth-watering entrée’s (sic) will have your stomach salsa dancing in no time.” Well, we danced ourselves right out of that restaurant and never looked back.

Empanadas With Two Fillings

Dough makes approximately 12 empanadas (or more if you roll the dough into smaller circles for empanaditas, which are cocktail size)

I prefer my empanadas baked rather than fried. These flaky pastries can be stuffed with myriad fillings, but these are two of my favorites.

For Dough:

2 cups unbleached all purpose flour

1 teaspoon baking powder

½ teaspoon salt

¼ cup vegetable oil

¼ cup cold butter, roughly chopped at the last minute

½ cup very cold water

1 egg, beaten in a small bowl

Place dry ingredients in the bowl of a food processor and turn machine on. Pour oil through feed tube, and then drop in the butter a few pieces at a time. Mixture should get crumbly. Add cold water, also with the machine running, until dough forms and pulls away from sides of bowl. Remove and knead for a moment into a smooth ball. Wrap dough in plastic wrap and set aside for at least twenty minutes or up to a few hours. It can also be refrigerated for up to a day, but bring it back to room temperature before using. When ready to use, preheat oven to 400 degrees. Divide dough into twelve equal portions (or more if making cocktail size) and roll each portion out on a floured board into circles that are approximately 5-6” in diameter. Place a couple tablespoons of filling on the lower half or each circle and fold over to form half-moon. Crimp edges with the tines of a fork and then poke fork into the top of the dough once or twice to allow steam to escape during baking. Place the empanadas on an ungreased baking sheet and brush with the beaten egg. Bake for 20-25 minutes until lightly colored and heated through (bake the cocktail size for about 12-15 minutes). If you form them early in the day they can be covered with plastic wrap and refrigerated until ready to bake. I often freeze the bakes empanadas, after they have completely cooled, and use them when guests arrive unexpectedly or for a quick and easy meal. Simply let them defrost for about an hour and then bake at 350 degrees until heated through, about 15 minutes.

Picadillo (Sweet & Sour Ground Meat) Filling:

Serves 4

I use ground turkey instead of beef for this flavorful, piquant dish which can be served over rice or wide egg noodles or used as a filling for empanadas.

1 – 1 ¼ pound ground turkey

1 large onion, finely chopped

2 cloves garlic, finely minced

2 drained bottled pickled jalapeno chilies (about 1 ½ tablespoons), finely chopped

1 teaspoon ground cumin

1 teaspoon chili powder

1 teaspoon crumbled dried oregano

½ teaspoon cinnamon

½ teaspoon ground cloves or allspice

¼ – ½ teaspoon dried red chili flakes

¼ cup olive oil

1 ½ cups chunky tomato sauce or crushed tomatoes

2 tablespoons tomato paste

½ cup raisins

1 tablespoon drained tiny capers

¼ cup chopped pitted green olives (optional)

Salt and freshly ground pepper

Heat 2 tablespoons olive oil in a medium sized skillet over moderately low heat. Add onion, garlic, jalapenos, cumin, chili powder, oregano, cinnamon, and cloves to pan. Sauté, stirring, until onion is softened, about 5 minutes. Set aside. In a large skillet, heat the remaining olive oil over moderately high heat. Add the ground turkey and cook, breaking up any lumps, until meat is no longer pink. Add tomato sauce or tomatoes, tomato paste, raisins, capers, red pepper flakes, and olives (if using). Lower heat and simmer, uncovered, for 5 minutes. Add onion and garlic mixture to skillet, stir to combine, and continue to simmer for another 5 minutes, until it is thickened and most of the liquid has evaporated. Use to stuff empanadas or serve over rice or wide egg noodles.

Spinach and Cheese Filling:

1 10 ounce package frozen spinach, thawed over-night and drained very well to remove all liquid

1 egg, beaten

1 cup ricotta cheese

½ heaping cup of crumbled feta cheese

Salt and freshly ground pepper

1 tablespoon fresh parsley, finely minced (optional)

Combine all ingredients in a bowl and taste for salt. Be generous with the black pepper. Filling is now ready to use to stuff empanadas.