The Catskill Chronicle

Twice Divorced by Grayce Goin

Dear Twice Divorced:

With the holidays fast approaching, I find myself thinking about New Year’s Resolutions.

Every year I make resolutions with good intentions and the belief I can do it!  

And every year I fail to keep them. 

Do you make resolutions? If you do, how do you manage to keep them?

Disheartened in Dale

Dear Disheartened,

For many years now I have had only one New Year’s resolution: don’t make any resolutions.

I believe that most people who follow this practice only set themselves up for frustration and disappointment.

I am not saying that making an honest list of our individual shortcomings and then realistically addressing them is a bad idea, however the annual quest for multiple changes is, at its core, a self-destructive practice.

What I strongly suggest is to start with the smallest item on your list, figure out the steps necessary to get to your ideal level on that issue then take those steps one at a time until you have reached your goal. Don’t let the calendar necessarily be your guide – think about starting and the steps in order – when you are emotionally and mentally ready, then start.

When the first goal is attained, then move on to the next more difficult issue and follow the same procedure – success builds upon success – we all know someone who planned to lose 40 pounds while giving up smoking and beer or coffee or some such thing. After a week or so of withdrawal everyone around them is ready to give them every one of these items and more to settle them down, or just strangle them.

Once again, I wish everyone lots of love to fill your heart, good health with which to enjoy your loved ones, enough wealth to fill your needs with a little left over to share with those less fortunate and Happy Holidays.

Be Well